After posting the Shine of the Brangeloonie, a few GOTA readers requested a shrine for the Claymate species. I thought about what the average Claymate might appreciate and after careful study, concluded that most are likely to be collectors of the sort of trinkets seen advertised in the back of Ladies Home Journal. There's a good chance many of them own unicorn figurines, music boxes, frightening dolls, Disney trinkets, or something atrocious by Thomas Kinkade. I realize it's a gross generalization, but I'm sticking to my instincts after examining several Claymate fan sites. I believe I've created a dazzling Clay Aiken tribute they won't be able to resist: The Clay Aiken Singing Angel Music Box.
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Samantha
Posted by: Samantha Berger | August 05, 2009 at 03:30 PM
That's the funniest thing I've seen in a long time. Those trinket ads show up in all kinds of places... in the back of crossword magazines especially. You nailed it perfectly, as you do every time. The way that little angel Clay is blowing the microphone is SO funny. And those claymates... they're actually scarier than the brangeloonies!
Posted by: Jenn F. | August 21, 2008 at 08:56 AM
genius!
and scary
Posted by: Bea Gass | August 20, 2008 at 08:25 AM
I think he's a darling, but this is so-o-o funny!
Posted by: Sabrina | August 19, 2008 at 08:23 AM
I love your parody of the Bradford Exchange and its horrific kitch. Yes, it is sooo appropriate for the Claymates! I agree with everyone else. I love how he is giving the microphone head.
Posted by: Demon Kitty | August 18, 2008 at 06:12 PM
I just choked!!! ROTFLMAO!
Posted by: Jenn | August 14, 2008 at 09:56 AM
ambs and kitties and cherubs, oh my! And a rainbow peeking out the backdoor tops things off nicely.
I know it's a spoof, but you KNOW there's a Claymate out there who go this picture and and trying to figure out where to get one. And for only 359.91? It is indeed claygasmic.
14, you are the bee's knees!
Thorne Smith
Posted by: Thorne Smith | August 14, 2008 at 05:20 AM
OMG - that started out so funny and that got really frightening - those claymates are going to give me nightmares tonight (or if not them then definitely that creepy doll will)
Although I must say about five years ago, I use to watch the shopping network when they would sell all this horrondeous crap - I swear I didn't buy any of it - but I liked watching it because the announcer had this very soothing voice as she described all the little details on another piece of junk. It was like relaxing to the hushed sounds of golf announcers as they whisper about Tiger Woods upcoming shot.
Posted by: FreakyFanGirl | August 13, 2008 at 09:24 PM
OMG - I cannot stop laughing!!!! Please please please tell me you are making a mint off of your site - you are one of the most talented bloggers out there.
And whenever anyone gives me an earful about "stereotyping," I will point to this post. People, you really need to stop being caricatures of yourselves - I mean, come on, can we all say "fag hag" together? Christ on a cracker....
Posted by: Jessica | August 13, 2008 at 07:12 PM
Faylinn,
You have a room full of Claymates AND Bowie pictures? Who'da thunk it?!
(snicker, snicker)
PS 14,
She's right about the licensing, you could be a CLAjillionaire!
Posted by: Vern | August 13, 2008 at 04:29 AM
this is a perfect relic for claymates, who seem to use his faux-purity to hide their own strange perversions (lovely microphone there).
that canopy almost gives the the affect of a closet he's stepping out from...
Posted by: javelin | August 12, 2008 at 11:04 PM
Oh God. That room looks like mine. Except mine has a wall full of David Bowie pictures. Yummm...
And 14, you better patent that or whatever you're supposed to do. I'm not a lawyer. You can make millions since "Claymates" will buy 10 each. At least.
Posted by: Faylinn | August 12, 2008 at 08:16 PM
Perhaps future versions should be made from an unbreakable resin. You did hear about the violent claymates beating each other up over a "tastes great - less filling" debate over which of his songs is best . . .
Posted by: CPTWilly | August 12, 2008 at 05:41 PM
Your digs aren't just digs...They're multi-tiered excavations of hilarity. Clay Aiken, celeb worship, and Thomas Kinkade, all stuck on a shiny paint-brush skewer and barbecued just right for some fine summer eatin'.
Stop being brilliant for one minute, please: It's hard for most of us mortals to keep up.
Posted by: Viper Tetsu | August 12, 2008 at 02:25 PM
aaaaaaaaaaaahahahahahahahahahah "It lights up!!!" ahahahahahahahahahahaha *dies*
Posted by: jerkygirl | August 12, 2008 at 06:40 AM
Claynifiscence in all his glory [whole]!
Ahhhsome job, 14!
Posted by: BlackbeltBetty | August 11, 2008 at 09:44 PM
Pulled up my fave site....I burst out laughing while at work. A co-worker looked over and asked me where she could buy the shrine. 14, YOU ARE A GENIUS!!
Posted by: Steve | August 11, 2008 at 06:17 PM
You just know that Mr. Kink-aid is stabbing himself in the eyes with his vintage Gaultier/Mundaina bra cone, as he is beside himself with jealousy that HE didn't come up with this bit of genius himself!
Posted by: Vern | August 11, 2008 at 07:50 AM
Love the way Clay is blowing the microphone.
Um, re: the Claymates: Sheer. Raving. Lunacy.
Posted by: Dr. L. | August 11, 2008 at 07:48 AM
Are you sure that's a microphone? Looks like he's about to "service" someone. He's a pretty creepy and icky guy, some are even calling him the white(r) Michael Jackson.
Posted by: Erik | August 11, 2008 at 07:05 AM
Aww. This will look perfect in his new baby's room. You did both Clay and Mr. Kinkade proud!
(It scares me to death...)
Posted by: Michael Ian | August 11, 2008 at 05:39 AM