After reading blog comments under the announcement of the Jolie-Pitt Twins yesterday, I witnessed first hand the raving insanity of the frothing Brangeloonies. Similar to the Claymates in their blind devotion and ceaseless worship of famous people they don't even know, the Brangeloonies were out in full force yesterday practically declaring the birth of The Twins a national holiday and labeling anyone who dared to disagree as "haters" or "trolls". How very pre-school! A commenter might write something as innocent as "what's the big deal, so lots of babies were born that day" and within minutes a stomping crowd of torch bearing witch-hunters are at his throat. Another curious trait of the Brangeloonie is the nearly unanimous vitriol aimed at Jennifer Aniston. Brad and Jen divorced 3 years ago, but in the snarling eyes of the Brangeloonie, somehow she's still an unwilling player. I collected some of the goodies from various blogs to share with you. And no, I did not make any of these up - they're all 100% real:
"I only want to celebrate and sing her praises. I have been down on my knees all morning, where I know she would want me to be, blessing this holy family. god bless the jolie-pitts!"
"OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG—– My life now has meaning. You guys, today is totally my birthday…. and my mom’s name is Vivian! (I know darling Vivienne is spelled differently, but still)This is the first thing I’ve been able to share with the blessed Jolie-Pitts. I am over the moon."
"The trolls are really losing it, they are dying of envy. I won’t even give a second of my time reading or posting about a person I don’t like. That’s the power of Angelina, they can’t get away from her."
"This is such exciting news and the lovely posts are a pleasure to read from you JP fans. Makes it easy to bypass the unhappy jealous hateful people who cant help but show their ugliness at such a blessed time. Nothing can take away our joy today."
"I’m really getting tired of being hated on just because I want people to be happy. Babies are a gift from God, especially from people as wonderful as Brad and Angie. All you Aniston (yuck) lovers out there are just jealous that he’s happy and successful now. I think she needs to adopt an Indian baby next or something even more exotic to add to the beauty that is their family. Maybe one from Romania?"
"By the crazy reaction from the haters, we know Jen Aniston is miserable and in pain right now. hehehe. Brad got really emotional as he cut the ambilical cords, awww. I couldn’t even imagine how thrilled they both are."
"This should be a day of celebration, yet everyone is just so MEAN. Why can’t the twins and the rest of the Jolie-Pitts have at least ONE nice day without so many people trying to ruin it? She just had TWINS for crying out loud. Angelina is such a beautiful matyr; I wish I could be more like her. Sure, she’s kinda shunning America, but I still luv, luv, LUV her!!! Anyone else want to start a petition to wish them the best luck in the world?" The Brangeloonie Shrine is available exclusively at Babies R Us and Wal-Mart, but hurry, supplies are limited and rioting has already begun. Medium: photo composite.
bloody hell! i'm so glad i don't know anyone like that! well done on a hilarious and deservedly vitriolic site! :)
Posted by: Ro | December 28, 2009 at 01:38 PM
You have such a great, scathing sense of humor thanks!
Posted by: Collectible Plates | May 09, 2009 at 01:50 AM
Why blame Angelina for the demise of the "Golden Couple" Brad is the one who is married not Angelina, Brad was the one who dumped Aniston, If brad truly love JA no other person even if she look like HELEN of TRY would he left his wife. As for the FF poster you're a LIAR. I've been to FF site once and i read all kinds of hatred and 4 letters word they used for Angie and her kids.
Posted by: oh yeah | August 26, 2008 at 03:47 AM
Honestly, Jennifer Aniston got off easy. She should consider herself lucky to be done with such an empty vessel like Brad pitt. I think he's an oportunist who feed off of the women he becomes involved with. We all know that Angelna is the brains of the operation.
Posted by: Nicole | August 11, 2008 at 08:24 PM
I LOOOVE BRANGELINA!!
I'm not (quite) a Brangeloonie or whatever, but I love Shiloh and the Holy Twins. I'm a bit miffed by "Pax" and "Knox" together, but hey...they are all fantastic.
So all you haters clearly don't know anything and don't read enough Brangelina worship to be swerved or convinced.
Posted by: Paige | July 31, 2008 at 08:46 PM
I must protest. I'm a femalefirst member and there's not ONE post that wishes harm on any of those six kids. Not a one. Nor have I seen anything of the sort about Brad and Angelina. There have, however, been sick posts from Brangeloonies on the site wishing Jen miscarriages and making sick images of her with a Down's baby in her crotch.
You nailed it with this shrine, the Brangeloonies are nuts. Truly.
Posted by: Anon | July 30, 2008 at 04:34 PM
From reading the comments you've extracted and the comments posted here you have ably shown how there are loons coming from both sides - love and hate. The absurdity of it all is how the media and websites exploit the love/hate relationship people have with this couple and Jennifer Aniston for their own profit motives. Milk it for all it's worth. Four years and counting.
Posted by: Lordy | July 30, 2008 at 01:02 PM
First off, I have a great deal of regular commenting people at my site, pittwatch.com and they're not crazy fanatic, they're just fans. Nothing wrong with that.
Second, you've got something really wrong here:
"Another curious trait of the Brangeloonie is the nearly unanimous vitriol aimed at Jennifer Aniston. Brad and Jen divorced 3 years ago, but in the snarling eyes of the Brangeloonie, somehow she's still an unwilling player."
That's untrue. Most (notice I didn't say all) Brad and Angelina fans can't be bothered to talk about Jennifer Aniston at all. It's the media that keeps shoving it in everyone's face. It was US magazine that posted a lame story yesterday that it had been eight years since Brad and Jen married. They can't let it go, whereas Brad, Angelina, and Jennifer have moved on. And so have the real fans.
And for what it's worth, some so-called "Brangeloonies" - myself included - are fans of all three people.
Posted by: Sherry | July 30, 2008 at 12:29 PM
Adopt more exotic babies? That's racist.
Posted by: Exotic Arabian | July 30, 2008 at 12:03 PM
You want to see some REAL hate and obssession. Take a look at this place.
http://www.femalefirst.co.uk/board/forum-40.html
Remember, these people have been posting here 24/7 since 2004! That's over 4 years
people!
Posted by: Karlie mouse | July 30, 2008 at 11:46 AM
why is O.K to hate/judge/state something that is just rumour about someone you have never met, but not O.K to like someone you have never met. Who would gallery of the absurd take the piss out of if celebrites went away? why have a blog about people you could not care about?
Posted by: drew | July 30, 2008 at 09:36 AM
The loonies insanity knows no bounds.
Posted by: amazed | July 30, 2008 at 08:19 AM
You think the Brangelina fans are bad? Have you ever looked at the posts on the Aniston friendly sites like Female First? These people are sick. Not only do they spew their vitriolic hatred at Brad and Angelina--everything from wishing them dead to all sorts of other crap--but they spew it on the children. Calling the adopted ones everything from ugly n-g-r to hoping they'll die or get hit by a car etc.
Yes, the Brangaloonies can be bad, but the Aniston fans just won't let go and move on. Brad and Angie are obviously super happy with their family, their work, and their charities. They have similar views when it comes to kids and work. Brad and Jen were incredibly mismatched. You could see it in interviews that the two of them did separately and together. Hopefully Jen will find someone too.
All of these loonies need to get a life.
Posted by: Dancer | July 30, 2008 at 07:36 AM
If they can get hat down to 5 easy payments of $19.95 I'm all over it.
Posted by: Dr Zibbs | July 23, 2008 at 05:29 PM
A petition to wish them luck? How about just wishing them luck?
keep up the good work (as always), 14!
Posted by: Erick | July 21, 2008 at 06:54 PM
This is really hysterical. Anyone who worships celebrities needs to have their head examined! That said, my Angelina tattoo is healing nicely, but I'm only a so-so fan.
Posted by: Jennifer Anuston | July 21, 2008 at 05:38 PM
I came back to post something positive, to detract from all the negative energy I have spewed forth on this site, making so many people miserable .... and I give you motivational stories and sayings from
Penny Parker2
I will also give you a Precious Moment as a peace offering.
Posted by: Demon Kitty | July 21, 2008 at 01:55 PM
I am deluded. I am bitter. I have so much rage! Oh my God! I must do something about this!
I give it all to Jesus. No more negativity!
From now on it is all Thomas Kincaid, Precious Moments, those Hallmark affirmations, and a good attitude! An optimistic attitude. Everything is wonderful. Life is beautiful. I will take up knitting and listen to Clay Aiken.
If someone says something "negative" or "angry", I shall respond with a puritanical and chatising rant of my own.
Negativity for the sake of Optimism and a good attitude!
Posted by: Demon Kitty | July 21, 2008 at 01:28 PM
I hate to upset you but I regularly look on Dlisted and some of those scary comments I suspect were made up when some Dlisters went over there for a laugh. That said, even a small glance at Just Jared under any Ange related topic is scary. I got a comment deleted merely because I said that I was glad she had paid for these babies via 'Buy one, get one free, IVF for anorexics' as she liked the babies she buys best. Some people are so touchy!!
Posted by: Lisa B | July 21, 2008 at 07:08 AM
Posted by:moonmaid | July 19, 2008 at 09:34 AM
I'm dying of laughter right now. I just wanted to let you guys know that I think all but one of those comments were made by a bunch of us from Dlisted making fun of justjared.com's Brangeloonies. I personally made 3 of those comments just to see who would believe it; we had a blast that day.
=========
CHECK OUT THIS POSTER .. so they practically admitted that THEY, NOT the JJ posters that were the one behind those posts that this site gave as an example of the so called brad and Angelina fans. So whose the real lunatic the fans or the IMPOSTORS from D-listed posing as JP fans? The WINNER = DLISTED posters the BIGGEST LOONIES on the internet!! FYI they are also a bunch of MENTAL CASE for reals.
Posted by: oh yeah | July 21, 2008 at 02:04 AM
I have to say that I still find it hard to believe that somehow Brad and Angelina not only noticed me, but also found me worthy enough to name their child after me.
I say, "Let the haters rage."
Posted by: Knox Bronson | July 21, 2008 at 01:22 AM
Very good however, I've found the comments made by the Brange detractors (which apparently are the same mob as the Team Anniston people) waaay more scarey. These people will let nothing (including rational thought, general fairness and basic facts) get in the way of their vitriolic, hateful diatribe. 'Tis better to be a lover than a fighter after all, no?
Posted by: frewt | July 20, 2008 at 09:24 PM
I can't believe that some people see this as racist... for God's sake, Angelina has BIG LIPS so it can easily be assumed that her bioligical kids will have BIG LIPS TOO. Since Brad and Angelina are both white, why would race come into this when talking about the twins? Christ, people are too jumpy about playing the race card.
Posted by: Jenn F. | July 20, 2008 at 04:12 PM
This isn't off topic. These are written by nutty fans. I hope you can make something with these too.
nyaaaaaaaahaha!!!!!!!!! (Uncertified Bastard)
hil dugg is da bombizzle and she rox so lay off or u will pay and if u want 2 no how hil will take out ur eyeballs with her pretty shews and kill dem. sumfin's up dawg.
Thursday, January 4th, 2007 @ 10:45pm
A hilary duff nut asa well^^^^
KIKI (Uncertified Bastard)
YOU ALL SUCK COCK YOU MOTHER FUCKEN BITCHES I HOPE YOU ALL GET RUN DOWN AND KILLED
{~GO HIL~}
Sunday, January 21st, 2007 @ 5:21pm
nyaaaaaaaahaha!!!!!!!!! (Uncertified Bastard)
like hil dugg rox she iz da bombizzle i luv her but alas i do not kno her os i will never kno her but she is still da bomb and if u duznt like her u will pay.
Thursday, January 4th, 2007 @ 10:46pm
reply
These people are loons too.
Posted by: Psychochick | July 20, 2008 at 01:40 PM
http://www.aaroncake.net/misc/showthought.asp?thought=50
Even dumber than Brangeloonies......
Posted by: Psychochick | July 20, 2008 at 01:30 PM
For some reason, I feel as if the person in charge of this blog is not a big fan of the Brangelina brood. I haven't seen a "non-negative" illustration of their family just yet.
Posted by: cavawho | July 20, 2008 at 08:18 AM
The image of the twins is a bit racist. It looks like those old images of the Sambo character. I know people will disagree but it comes off as racist caricature. Also, a study was done and it seems Angelina's supporters are more edgy/big city/urban women while Aniston's supporters were more small town Middle America. Don't know what it means but read it somewhere. Anyway, I say attack the parents but leave the innocent babies out of this. Blended families - especially racially blended ones - are beautiful. So let it be. Who cares? Maybe these fans have hard lives and she gives them a smile in the middle of a hard day. Dunno. Prince does that for me. His music makes me feel ok after a tough day and I don't know him but I connect to him. Alright, I am out before the attacks come...(as she ducks)...
Posted by: Lisa C | July 20, 2008 at 01:34 AM
Why are you all so cynical! Angie and Brad are God sent. They show us how the world can be rainbow like. How all children are equal. How color does not matter. They encourage us to give and to give to charity and humanity. Angelina was blessed with twins because through the millions she donates, she has saved lives and so God has blessed her with twins and a beautiful family. Who would know Namibia existed if she did not talk about it? nobody cared about New Orleans til Brad started his project there. Nobody knew that Darfur had problems til she went to talk about the refugees there. Thats is why people listen - they are famous. If it was just an average person - we would not hear about these awful things but famous people can reach more people and make us understand. Angie and Brad have chose to do this out of the goodness of their heart - they don't have to do it. So God bless their children. An dyes, Chinnifer Maniston is annoying and a C actress from TV but who cares about her? What has she done for charity? W e care about Angie and Brad because they give back. That is what you are supposed to do. My friend told me to check out this site out of curiosity but it seems very bitter. Open your minds people. We are all one: the human race!
Posted by: Brangie Love | July 20, 2008 at 01:26 AM
A brilliant piece of art/satire.
Posted by: Pas Jolie | July 19, 2008 at 08:57 PM
BoycottLINKSdotCom:
PLAYING the scorned woman? Well, since she really was scorned and dumped by Brad Pitt for his co-star at the time, I'd say she didn't need to play at it. It was the real thing.
14:
Thanks for the Dlisted love...we love you, too - and your site! I look forward to more of your genius works of art.
Posted by: paris | July 19, 2008 at 07:49 PM
What these fanatics don't realize is that Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt would not wipe thier feet on them if they passed them on the street.
Posted by: QueenVelveeta | July 19, 2008 at 03:19 PM
Let me get this straight? You people have left over 59 comments on this thread, and the 'Gallery,' suthor is so well versed on not only 'Brangelina,' but their millions of fans, tracking down their posts all across the web. Yup, sounds like major disinterest to me. I couldn't tell you where ashley Simpson's threads, fans and webistes reside if you put a gun to my head - THAT is how true disinterest works my sad self-righteous friends. As for Jen Aniston, don't really know or care about her either - she's given the world bad rom-coms and a hairdo. But I did find the Vanity Fair interview she did in which she trashed Pitt and tried to ruin his career by playing the scorned woman, more entertaining than anything she's ever done career-wise, and it actually was probably the best thing for it. Who is she, if not teh TV sit-com hack dumped by Brad Pitt. As for Brangelina, I like their movies, their kids are cute, and they give a lot of money away to people that need it, and Brad is building houses for folks in my hometown. So yeah, I guess of all the people who get famous, and end up with lots of money and success, I probably resent them the least. They sure don't deserve the racist caricatures of their newborns, nor do they deserve to be shat upon by obsessed people claiming they don't care. I mean, come on - you do know know how OBVIOUS you are, right? LOL
Posted by: BoycottLINKSdotCom | July 19, 2008 at 02:06 PM
Oh how I love you clever D-listers. If you really did make up some of those loonie Brangelina comments and post to JJ, I need to become pals with you because you are my kind of people. Tricksters UNITE!
xoxo
14
Posted by: 14 | July 19, 2008 at 12:45 PM
This is immaculately entertaining.
I am well aware of which site those comments came from, it is the only site left that still believes in the Tooth Fairy, Easter Bunny and this "artist" known as Angelina Jolie.
Thankfully the looney loosers are corralled in one spot and occasionally run their terrorist missions to other sites and blogs only to be met with posters offering up reality infused prescriptive snark and the loons run back to their clubhouse and practice darts on pics of Jennifer Aniston.
I personally still have a shred of hope left for Brad Pitt somehow, some way surviving the hostile coup of his once digestible persona.
Fame whoring at this level requires much more effort than trying to remain private.
The tides are turning on this family and for that I am honestly grateful.
Cheers.
Posted by: Roast and Rake | July 19, 2008 at 12:20 PM
Brangeloonies need to get a life.
I guess this is how Jesus got started.
Posted by: Quinn | July 19, 2008 at 11:26 AM
Well you dare you take sample of the post of the fans about Brad & Angelina, but did you by chance read all that are posted right now in your own blogs.. read and weep this are the posts of who people who are more lunatics than brad & Angelina fans. They are the worst kind, the most rabid haters which you i guess love to be written in your website. Maybe the writer of this blog should visit FemaleFirst website and read all the posters there and maybe you'll get better understanding of what and who are the SCARIEST & THE MOST INSANE PEOPLE ON THE INTERNET (where they wish the all the kids die and Angelina should die of cancer, giving birth etc., etc.) certainly it's not the BRANGELOONIES as you called them.
Posted by: HA read your own backyard! | July 19, 2008 at 10:12 AM
I'm dying of laughter right now. I just wanted to let you guys know that I think all but one of those comments were made by a bunch of us from Dlisted making fun of justjared.com's Brangeloonies. I personally made 3 of those comments just to see who would believe it; we had a blast that day.
Posted by: mel mel | July 19, 2008 at 10:07 AM
Purty darn scary!
Don't these people pay attention to the rest of the world? War? Economic turmoil? Global warming & starvation? The Tour de France?
Obviously the answer is no. Nice artwork, 14. What's funny is that the comments on it and your post contain more examples of just what you are talking about, from both sides.
The only time I even think about these people is when I look at online news.
Posted by: moonmaid | July 19, 2008 at 09:34 AM
"blessed" and "martyr"?
Aha ha ha! These are unwed people living together having kids, anyone think its weird that the religious nuts think this is okay but if it wasn't "them" it would be a sin?
What a bunch of freaking LOONS.
Posted by: EvilShoe | July 19, 2008 at 09:24 AM
There are also crazy Jennifer fans, especially at femalefirst. They are OBSESSED with hating Angelina, it is one thing to dislike her but jen fans sometimes are psycho....
Some Jennifer fans pray for Angelina to miscarry, die in a plane crash, they describe how they would like to MURDER the twins, they were jumping for joy when Angelina's mother died, also some refused to believe she was pregnant and said they were waiting for a stillbirth announcement.
I think those Jen fans are just as crazy as the "brangeloonies" you make fun of.
Posted by: ... | July 19, 2008 at 09:02 AM
Are these people for real? I'm especially perplexed at the poster who wrote his/her life has meaning now because of the twins birth. WTF??
Posted by: Miss Lios | July 19, 2008 at 08:59 AM
ha, nice pic!
5 crazy Brangeloonies out of 5!
Ive never met people like that, but maybe thats because i dont usually read comments (unless its for your site, because you generally have sane people visiting) and I dont have any insane friends (maybe in secret they are crazy like this, but i dont know).
I cant believe people live through their lives. Im a fan of artists, but im a fan of their work not their personal lives...
Posted by: Jules | July 18, 2008 at 10:54 PM
1. Fans like that scare the living hell out of me.
2. Yeah, I like Angelina (but not Brad), and I'm happy for her and all, but I also like Jen Aniston. Yes, it's possible to like both of them.
Posted by: Laura | July 18, 2008 at 06:30 PM
LOL. I cant wait to see what these kids look and act like when they hit their teens.
Primarily, is it Maddox, with the 'go to ' photo with him in full mohawk, sticking out his tounge.
This NEW generation of all these stars havibng babies (Ange, Brits sis, Ash Sims, nicole ritchie to name a few)
Posted by: mellen | July 18, 2008 at 06:53 AM
Those quotes were really frightful! I have had the same experience being hassled by Madonnaloonies in the gay world. Apparently, they think if you're gay and dislike Madonna, you're old, fat and a fan of Liza. I maintain that I am none of the three. But I have found it useless to argue over the internet. I have started telling these lunatics that I only enjoy brunette Madonna. They're cool with that.
Posted by: GayAl | July 18, 2008 at 05:03 AM
...and I thought my Hugh Laurie obsession was bad.
*hugs House doll*
Posted by: Eize | July 18, 2008 at 01:37 AM
I have not learned a moral lesson from any of this and neither has my filthy mouth.
Posted by: Demon Kitty | July 17, 2008 at 06:01 PM
Hey 14, why is that when I posted a comment it was posted by the screen name MDF and then unfortunately "Bradley Armpit"s" comment was posted under my screen name Jade?
Posted by: Jade | July 17, 2008 at 09:45 AM
Wow, that is some crazy shit. Amazing how beauty blinds people... just because they're both extremely good looking they're now somehow elevated to the level of saints and martyrs. And for the birth (and naming) of their twins to give someone's life meaning? That is sad.
Adam, as soon as I started reading the Bradley Armpit piece I knew it was you. Too funny. Your comments are always fun to read.
Posted by: Jenn F. | July 17, 2008 at 09:08 AM
OH, I FORGOT TO SAY - FANTASTIC pic, 14. As always - hilarious LOL
Posted by: jenner | July 17, 2008 at 05:44 AM