What If.....

For months the world has been anticipating the arrival of the Brangelina baby. Tabloids and bloggers have been speculating that this baby is destined to be the Most Beautiful Child Ever. New York Magazine ruffled feathers when stating "Not since Jesus has a baby been so eagerly anticipated." What I'd like to speculate is.....what if the offspring of Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt isn't as stunningly gorgeous as everyone assumes? What if she's just a regular looking baby....maybe even a little goofy looking? It could happen! Just one look at the adorable baby Kevin Federline was able to produce for Britney Spears shows just how unpredictable the genetic lottery can be. Congratulations to the growing Jolie-Pitt clan. We're happy to learn that little Shiloh Nouvel Jolie-Pitt has arrived healthy and without complication. Despite my contrary speculation, there's a high likelihood this kid is going to be a looker. Medium: Acrylic and gouache on board. SOLD

Comments

[mike]

interesting blog, i'll come back again soon

[internet marketing services]

"Not since Jesus has a baby been so eagerly anticipated." lol

[Peta]

What was scary was when "The Fabulous Life" ended their baby Shiloh episode (while the kid was still kicking it utero style) with a generated photo of what she'd probably look like at 18. All this expectation of Super Goddess looks from a regular human baby. *shakes head*

[emann]

Now that's some art to laugh about

[Suggs]

This is absolutely fantastic

[Gadget Man]

Ok so they definitely are the two most sexiest people in the world but I still reckon their baby's not gonna be a stunner. Love the painting though!

[bob gardner]

why does everyone talk about babies in such a way that people write these sort of blogs

[nathaniel]

brilliant. i love it. genius.

[Suzette]

Man, why isn't this a print? I think this would look beautiful in my spa bathroom! Please make a print, pretty please with sugar?

[Lou K]

The picture is hysterical and the comments are entertaining. Was searching for blogs on plastic surgery and came across this post .... had a good time spending a few minutes here. Clicked on a few ads to say thanks ... Lou K - Orange County Plastic Surgery

[eric]

does anyone know what the original work is of this parody?

[Kathy]

Someone above mentioned Angelina has had plenty of plastic surgery. What has she ever had? I have never heard that she had anything done. I know her lips are real -- she had those same lips when she was six years old.

[anjelica]

y ou bitche's on jennifer aniston side she is as plain as a flat shoe I read their card's thir kid's together less better looking.

[Tara]

I almost peed in my pants looking at this picture! I had to email it to all of my friends and family! But all kidding aside, it is possible for two pretty people to have a hobbit for a child as it is possible for two homely people to have a beautiful one...as I have seen examples of both. Keep up the awesome work!

[Antonia]

This pic made me giggle like a Japanese school girl.

[Soletrane]

Regarding all this speculation about Shiloh's appearance. There is statistical phenomenon called 'regression to the mean' that speaks to this.

In other words, if you have two parents who have extreme characteristics (famed physical beauty) than it is more likely than not that their children will also share some of this characteristic (i.e. physically attractiveness) but will probably be closer to 'normal' (in physical attractiveness) than their parents.

It also works the other ways, if a person has an extreme characteristic (e.g. 7ft tall) then his parents are likely to be tall but much closer to normal height than their child. This explains why you often see beautiful people come from more normal looking parents.

[Alex]

is just gonna be a normal baby, with normal parents who have amazing jobs, and amazing bank accounts! have to hate them! theyre so beatiufl that you know its not going to work... too perfect to be true

[Melanie]

All Brad has ever wanted is to be taken seriously. He uglied up for movies that were real stinkers. Now he doesn't have to ugly up - age is taking over. He moved on to AJ to be taken seriously. Serious about world causes. He was perfect in Thelma and Louise. I wanted him to continue on with the pretty boy roles, not the scruffy old beards, dirty hair and knocked out teeth. Now it's too late. What a crying shame to trade in his best features all these years. It didn't help him one iota.

[Action]

I totally agree that newborns are NOT cute. I have a 7 mo. old and I STILL think they aren't cute. I love my little girl to pieces, but sweetie? You just WEREN'T cute until you were at least 2 months old.

[licoricepirate]

everyone knows that

hot parent + hot parent = fug child !!!

[Jenny]

That. was. awesome.

[Pookie Hart]

Pookie Hart is my porn star name. Anyway I just wanted to say that 14 has got immense talent. I love the the way humour and art blend in her work. I absolutely love this one in particular. I have to say that I'm so sick of people talking about how gorgeous the baby is. It's a baby, and it freaks me out when the word "gorgeous" is used to describe it. We're a nation obsessed with an infant's lips. That would be in my suicide note most definitely.

[Frisky Shadowridge]

OK, I was *secretly* hoping the Brangelina baby would be ugly and she's not. She's actually very, very pretty for a newborn...I wonder, has she had work done? But I do agree with the posters who said Shiloh Nouvell sounds like a porn star name - kind of like the game to come up with your alter-ego porn star name: For your first name you take the name of your favorite pet, and for your last name you take the name of the street where you grew up (hence Shiloh (beagle) Nouvell (Blvd.)?). Lord help poor little Shiloh - screwed up name, maneater/nutjob mother, loveslave/babysitter father creating their own little UN, and being the focus of photographers/stalkers bidding war at 2 weeks old. I can just imagine a rebellious teenaged Shiloh rejecting her parents' "ideals" by renaming herself Sheila and getting a job folding sweaters at the GAP. Now wouldn't that be ironic? I doubt we'll be so lucky, we've probably got the next Paris Hilton on our hands.

Sincerely, "Frisky Shadowridge" (my own porn star alter-ego)

[Tiare]

First of all, Shiloh is g-o-r-g-e-o-u-s. Even so soon after her birth when she should still be all wrinkled and bruised. So is Angelina. Just look at her pictures when she was a little kid. She never was the least bit ugly.
I never understood why Brad was with Jen, she was the luckiest girl alive to land him and keep him for as long as she did. She's barely passably attractive. Her face is huuuuuge. The only thing she's got is her personality.
I always thought Angie and Brad should be together, they're both gorgeous and a little wild, but smart and caring. I don't really see how Shiloh is going to die to hear about what Angie did in her teens and twenties. Don't tell me YOUR parents were perfect angels. And who knows what they never told you about.
Sure, Shiloh is going to be famous and that can mess you up at least a little bit, but I don't see how she can't become a normal person. I'm more worried for Paris Jackson!

[Jennifer C]

hahaha okay, okay, so the baby's not "ugly" after all .... but damn! those ears were right on!!!

[china blue]

That pic tallies with my "Gorgeous+Gorgeous=Fugly, Possibly" theory, and also with the general feeling that this baby had three wise men visiting her after she was born...

[Long Island Irish]

Oh. My. God. Ya'll.

I just wanted to say that I'm beginning to wonder about Suri. We have seen a picture of Shiloh already (so cute!) and Suri is still MIA. Does anyone else think this is weird?

I just read my above comment over and although I still take the same stance I should have been a bit nicer.
Okay, Jolie has done some wierd stuff but she does love those kids and she is very caring about those in need. I don't think it's a show with her.
Pitt does appear to have had some sort of mid life crisis but he's also good to the kids and spends time with them so can we really complain?

Honestly I think the Jolie Pitts have a chance at raising their kids to care about others. Thier children will also survive to see their teens. This is more than is promised for the Federline's children. *shudders*

if I have to look at this picture ONE MORE TIME!
plz update..O.o

[Damien]

You just know the little beggar is going to be gorgeous ... oh well. Love the pic 14 and the parental gestures, such wonderful work as per usual.

[Cheetah]

I heard they haven't released a pic of the baby yet because it's black.

Ho ho ho... er, I mean, Ha ha ha.

[Long Island Irish]

14 that is classic! LOL I actually agree with some of the above post--what is this child going to think as she grows up and hears all the crazy stories about her parents, her mother mainly?
Jolie has done some VERY strange things in the past, I suppose that's why I don't like her much. Everyone is entitled to be a bit strange but she has just pushed herself over the limit and I think she does it to get attention.
Didn't Jolie herself come from a very messed up homelife? I suppose that's why she has lived such an odd life. Atleast she does some good for the poor in Africa.
Pitt has had some sort a breakdown. He's a complete tool! It's incredible to watch but he always needs her to lead the way and whenever someone asks him a question her looks at her. WEIRD!
I wouldn't be surprised if she leaves him soon since she got what she wanted--his seed. Atleast the kids look happy.
Angelina isn't so bad looking but I think Beyonce is way prettier any day.

Honestly though this kid is lucky compared to the Federline offspring.

Um, does anyone want to bet that we will see little Shiloh before we see the mysterious Suri?

[Et Tu Brute]

There is a distinct possibility that Shiloh could grow up to look like Chastity Bono.

Would we prefer that she be named an average name, like "Mary", for example? We could then speculate on the fact that she could grow up to be the mother of the next Messiah.

[gossippando.it]

wow very nice .!!.why baby is so ugly??^__^
kiss from Italy
Isabella

Piloh Shitt

[Booziesuzie]

Hey, don't through stones at glass houses. I bet u peeps who have slated the jolie-pitts are no very braw at aww... hee hee hee...Jelousy gets u no where ...

[Sticky]

Oh for... give them a break. This is what happens to people like Brad and Angelina - the media builds them up and then drops them on their heads. How many of you are Goodwill Ambassadors? How much money do you donate to charity? How would you like to be dogged by the paparazzi everywhere you go and have every little thing you do analyzed and critcized?

When have they ever said their child is the Chosen One? Do they run around claiming to be the World's Most Beautiful People? No - it's the tabloids and gossips rags that give them those monikers. It's old-fashioned jealousy that makes people write such horrid things about them.

I wish them well and hope their children can escape this bullshit unscathed.

[Devin]

It would be ironic if the bambina Jolie-Pitt were a ringer for a piglet, yet I'm sure she's absolutely adorable...who knows...we'll find out someday. Great illustration as usual!

[Steven]

What, no tattoo saying "Born To Hate The USA" yet? Where are all the piercings? This 'normal' baby won't do. It has a 'radical (dude)' name, where's the radical accoutrement? I am disappointed.

[turnia70]

all of you haters need to shut the hell up....for the guys, if you had a chance to do angelina or jen, you can't tell me you'd pick ugly ass jen....and as far as brad goes, i would totally do him in his trailer park or otherwise

[melissa]

Lady C, I totally want to go with E. I say 30 years from now we will see a book or made for TV movie where Angelina totally treats this kid like "mommy dearest". Did anyone catch the interview where Ang said she never really wanted natural kids. This kid is going to feel so totally unloved. I see her leaving both of them and moving to MO with the grandparents.
Very good painting. I think no matter how the kid looks this is going to reflect her inner feelings.

[jen]

hell everyone knows that she's just going to turn out like Paris Hilton, they all do!

And by the way excellent 14, excellent

[bettyboop]

F) FLIP YOU ALL OFF AND LIVE A LIFE YOU ALL WISHED YOU HAD

[Javelin]

I know this girl who I went to Sunday school with back in the day, and she has a gorgeous, Miss America look-alike mother and an average looking father, and somehow she managed to inherit all her parents' recessive, non-attractive qualities. Every time I saw her Mom come to pick her up I would just shake my head in disbelief.

If Shiloh doesn't turn out beautiful, the poor kid will have to deal with the collective disapointment of about a billion people, which is sad.

[patricia]

Or.....

she could be a cute little girl, who is taught to care about others, "do" instead just "talk the talk" and actually have a good purpose in life aside from Hollyweird.

P.S. Daddy doesn't keep his mouth shut.

[ladyC]

okay, first of all lennox...jolie actually means 'pretty' in french, i think you're just grasping at straws.
shiloh's life can go a few ways:

a)she will be ridiculously good looking but really weird

b)she'll be okay looking and kinda weird

c)ugly and completely crazy from all the stares and whispers of 'i don't understand it, her parents are really really ridiculously good looking'

d)a total bitch

e)knows how to just keep her mouth shut and smile pretty (just like daddy)

[Doppelganger]

Hilarious pic. Don't 2 negatives equal a positive, or 2 positives equal a negative?

I've seen a few really attractive people with unattractive kids. It's like their beautiful features are fighting it out and something goes wrong.

In any case, to answer someone's question, Angelina has blue eyes.

Oh, and about Demi & Bruce, I've got to say that Bruce screwed up the gene pool. Demi is drop dead gorgeous and her girls are...well.. NOT to say the least. I'm sure if Demi and Ashton have a child it will be beautiful (that's if she hasn't gone through menopause yet).

[Doppelganger]

Jolie is actually Angelina's middle name. She just dropped the Voight. I don't know why her brother has a different last name.

Jon Voight also has another 19 y/o daughter / actress named Skylar something who, by the way, is also extremely beautiful.

[KC]

Lets hope all these kids grow up with beautiful souls unlike their parents. Hopefully they wont see that adultry, going into foreign countries to show off what you have then donate a cheap amount of money, and just being flat out weirdos as ok. Brad Pitt isn't the greatest looking guy in the world. He looks like a human version of the GAY Ken doll. And Angelina looks like a total whack job with huge fish lips to match that ego of hers. They aren't the hottest people in hollywood and with all the speculation of their child being the most beautiful baby, since everyone is having such high expectations...I bet that baby won't even be all that good looking. But then again, it's a child and as adults we shouldn't judge a child.

All I know is that I'm sick of hearing about these people. They aren't the greatest parents, they aren't the greatest people, and I wont be surprised if this relationship doesn't last.

[sunny]

In response to Bernie, Voight is Angelina and James' legal last name. I remember seeing/reading an interview that said their middle names were specifically chosen to be used as stage names--because they sounded good. I guess John and Marcheline (whose name I don't know about, unless it's a stage name) planned to have famous kids from the beginning.

Excellent job, again, 14.

[Cyclops Kitten Natividad]

Is it true that Jennifer Aniston calls Jolie "Gollum" to her friends? She certainly has something with that comparison. Who knew Aniston had enough of a sense of humor to come up with something like that!