Gallery of the Absurd

Ashlee Simpson's T-Shirt Line Has Been Redesigned

What is it with all these "celebrities" designing lines of cheap flimsy t-shirts with images of their faces splashed across the front? WHO wears this crap?? Ashlee Simpson is the latest celebufluff to "design" her own line of t-shirts with yep, her face plastered all the front. I thought I'd put my marketing background to work and redesign her t-shirts to be more appealing:

Inspired by Ashlee's image of herself performing onstage as shown on her 100% rayon Twist Back Top, this punk-inspired edgy design is a more realistic portrayal of her singing career because it's the one performance everyone remembers.

I wasn't seeing the meaning in Ashlee's Little Miss Obsessive t-shirt (50% polyester!). I might be out of the loop - perhaps it's the name of a song off her new CD? Maybe she's obsessive? Can someone please explain? Anyway, with all the chatter about Ashlee's lip collagen, I thought this tee was much more appropriate.

She actually named one of her designs the Ashlee Zebra Face Tee. You can't make this stuff up.

An homage to Daddy. This sexy t-shirt features a flirty plunging neckline to show off your assets and is made with 100% spandex to hug your curves. Please be aware that sizes run small, so order accordingly.

Ashlee Simpson Has Horse Mouth

How does Ashlee Simpson get her mouth to stretch like that? No wait, DO NOT answer that. I stumbled across these two photos and there was no way I couldn't put them side by side for your amusement (or indifference).

Heavily medicated, I grabbed my sketchbook and oil pastels and produced this freakish amalgamation while in a state of delerium. I've been quite sick the past few weeks and have had to spend lots of time recovering with bed rest, so this is all I have to post today. I'm almost fully recovered and will be posting new, more coherent frivolities soon.

Celebrity Optical Illusions - Ashlee Simpson

While on vacation, I was thumbing through a Star magazine and came across an article speculating whether or not Ashlee Simpson had undergone a nose job.  Side by side photos compared the bumpy "before" nose with a slightly less bumpy "after" nose.  I looked hard, but couldn't really tell the difference. I did however, notice her chin. I've never been able to pinpoint exactly what Ashlee Simpson reminds me of until I picked up a book about optical illusions and saw the classic Young Girl - Old Woman Illusion.