If Diddy Was a Contestant on Project Runway

On last night's season premiere of Project Runway, contestants were given the challenge to create an outfit expressing "who you are as a designer" using their choice of premium fabrics. While the other contestants were excited about the challenge, Diddy turned his nose up because there wasn't any mink, artic fox or terry cloth to choose from. He stormed over to Heidi and Tim and screamed "Diddy can't use this cheap crap to make Diddy an outfit!! Diddy has impeccable personal style, exquisite taste and Diddy won't settle for anything less!!!" He stormed off the set while demanding his assistants go fetch Diddy-approved fine materials so he could create his design. Later, Diddy returns to compete in the runway challenge. Heidi asks where his model is and Diddy replies, " She and her lady friends are waiting for me back at the hotel, so let's make this quick - I've got champange chilling." Diddy's turn comes to walk down the runway. He's wearing a mink-accented, hand-stiched terry cloth bathrobe made from rare cotton imported from the South of France, a bejeweled golden crown rigged with spotlights to illuminate Diddy's face, and just in case no one can tell it's Diddy, a hand-crafted sign featuring his name in neon, attached to a fat 24K gold chain around his neck. Heidi screams at Diddy, "Auf Wiedersehen! You are eliminated...go home now!" and Diddy saunters off the stage, snaps his fingers, and all the models follow him out the door and back to his hotel. Britney Spears was a contestant last night too. You won't believe your eyes when you see the creation she and Pretty on the Outside came up with. Medium: photoshop and diamonds.

Comments

[Jenn F.]

My favourite part is the lights suspended by the crown, via a gold and diamond support system.

[Erik]

I bet even his boogers have bling bling in them.

Very well done, 14! I cannot stand this mega-egoist and its apparent that not many other people can either.

[Demon Kitty]

This comforts me during my dyke drama.

I will never forget, back in '96 or '97, when Diddy won a grammy. I believe he had a hit sampling the Police's "every Breath you Take". They asked Keith Richards what he though about artists (meaning, Diddy) sampling the songs of other artists. To which Richards growled in a disgusted manner, "Write your own songs, write your own damn songs!!!" Sorry we can't see Richards saying this. You can imagine.

I like how his head is so much bigger than his body. Diddy is just fucking obscene. He will burn in hell for all the animals he has indirectly killed.

Burn in hell Diddy! Burn in Hell!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Vernice]

mouth breather! how come he doesn't have a one legged pendant?

[Steve]

OUTSTANDING! I was going to fault you on not having girls draped across him, but you covered it in the backstory!

I'm sure the event inspired him to create his new fragrance, "Dissed".

[Demon Kitty]

You know, I never noticed the fucking Kentucky Fried Cruelty ads on here courtesy of NBC. Maybe I blocked it out.

[Knox Bronson]

I love it when I click on the link to your site first thing and there is a new image.
I just burst laughing out loud when i saw this. great way to start the day! thank you, as always, beautiful!

[Stuck in AL]

I love, love, love it! Those spotlights are such a hoot! It's a good thing his ego is not tangable or he'd never fit in a room!

[cubesugar]

what a self obsessed ugly rat! i hate him and always have.
good work 14

[Mezza]

Love the vacant stare and the hand-on-hip, that just nails the whole thing.
My fave Diddy-time was a couple of years ago when he got banned for life from the Ritz or Claridges or whatever in London for being what he is... a loud, money-ed, egotistical vulgarian. 'Impeccable' taste my foot!! For a pimp-daddy, maybe!!

[Noelegy]

He is living proof that money can't buy class. Yuck.

[fag]

hes a fucken retarded mother fucker, he needs a good smack across the chops