Fabio and George Clooney to Appear on Romance Title

Fabio has a big problem with birds. First he was humiliated and bloodied after a flock of ducks collided with his face as he rode a roller coaster. A few years later, he was attacked by a flying bird again after his date tried to take a picture of George Clooney sitting at a nearby table. I was seduced by the idea of Fabio and Gorgeous George embracing on the cover of one those cheesy romance novels Fabio used to pose for and I was overcome with the burning desire to paint it. Breathlessly, I held my pen and allowed the tantalizing image to pulsate through my body and onto the paper. Swoon. Medium: ink on paper, digital color and collage.

Here's a page torn passionately out of Fabio and George's romance novel Birds of a Feather. Written by Candace Kirby, it will leave you begging for more. Want to see more cheesiness? Here's a clever and fitting new term for overly processed, artificial, producer heavy songs: The Kraft Single.

Comments

[Jenn F.]

Oh man, I took one look at that image and started giggling away helplessly. The way you drew Fabio looking like a Neanderthal... and the expression on Clooney's face... and the E.T. Phone Home glow on Clooney's finger... the romance setting with the roller-coaster in the background... oh shit, you're killing me here. And then Candy's text?! It's just too much! You guys are freaking hilarious!!!

[midevil]

Breath taking, subtle yet passionate. Two nipples up!

[Javelin]

hahaha "their anger takes flight before their passion can"... hilarious. I love that weird, signature grimmace on Fabio's face.

'Kraft Single' ... perfect word to describe the music being peddled these days.
I think I'll start referring to Diddy as Cheese Grater, since he puts cheese in a slightly different form and grates my nerves.

[bonni]

Well, I admit I've read a lot of romance novels with Fabio on the cover, and I LOVE this one. The only thing is, George should be showing lots more cleavage...

[Vimal Samuel]

the pic is funny

[Katie]

He rose from the table and what!?!? I gotta know.

[jm]

hahahahaha you are so creative

[Demon Kitty]

Funny as fuck!

[Dianne]

14, you are on such a roll! Fantastic!

[Noelegy]

Fabio would make a good Easter Island head.

[r]

you summed up exactly what i was thinking as i poured over this confusing story reported in InTouch. good work. i think you cracked this case wide open.

[Fairlady Z]

Haha, this is what happens when egos collide, I suppose.

As for George's childish behavior, celebrities who don't want to get their picture taken need to get over themselves. Oh sure, you love the camera when you're on the red carpet or you're up on stage getting another crappy worthless award, and then you turn around and expect people to forget that you exist when you're on your leisure time? Grow up, you made it your life ambition to attract attention to yourself, and you don't get to pick and choose when it will happen. Deal with it.

The fact that George Clooney assumed the pictures were being taken of him is also just great. Hi George, you're not the only human in the world. Hard to understand, I'm sure.

Oh, and I've never thought that Fabio was attractive. His body, his face, his hair, even his silly name are just too over the top. Never saw what the big deal was about Clooney either, either for his looks or his acting. I will always associate him with the painfully campy Batman Forever.

[Vernice]

what is Fabio doing with Homer Simpson's nipples?

[Erick]

AHH! NO WAY you totally stole my idea. I was even going to have the excerpt. We think TOO much alike... it's scary.

[vernice]

What is Fabio doing with Homer Simpson's nipples?

[Knox Bronson]

I see the site looks like Gallery of the Absurd again! Not missing the NBC stuff at all. And, as someone else said above, you are on a ROLL, 14!
Loving it. -kb

[Alien #69.2, Sector B]

Knox,

Come on, don't you miss the Kentucky Fried Chicken ads all over my site? I sure do! In all seriousness, those damn KFC ads about killed me. I despise KFC and everything it stands for....and what do you know, I had to endure the torture of allowing those ads on my site all so I could make a buck. groan.

Gallery of the Absurd is about to change again so please enjoy it these next few weeks while it's still a toddler. My baby is about to grow up.

xoxo
14

[Vernice]

Oh 14!
Please don't feel bad about KFC! Think of their "sponsership" (mothership)as the ONE good thing they've done! They supported your genius, allowing you to create, giving pleasure to the world.
Besides, KFC offers a better punchline than Mc D's, who are even more evil as they lie about ingredients and make my fellow Celiacs ill.
much love and appreciation!
V

[midevil]

Wow, so the contract is up, eh? I sure hope it was worth it!

[14]

The contract is over. Time for a celebration - champange for everyone!!

xoxo
14

[Knox Bronson]

those ads were for KFC? I thought they were for rubber chickens. damn. i was going to buy one, too.

[Viper Tetsu]

There's something very sublimely Al Hirschfeld about the elegant lines of your Fabio depiction. Very, very cool. And funny as holy mutha get-out.

Is Clooney's not-so-subtle middle digit an homage to that cheesy 70's Christmas album cover with Grandma subliminally flipping off the family as they greet her at the door? Or am I just getting too delusionally obscure?

[Marie]

I love this so much, 14! This story made me a little sad. Fabio is a total sweetheart (met him at a gas station). He struck me as a totally humble and happy guy. These guys need to kiss and make up. Maybe your fantastic art will finally bring them together, hee-hee!

[OldNoob]

Lovely. But shouldn't George's bodice be a little bit ripped? Hahaha!

[Alisa]

I hope they both come across this. LOL