If Francisco Goya Had Painted Janice Dickinson

Francisco Goya (1746-1828) is often called the "father of modern art" and remains one of Spain's most important artists. A superb portraitist and skilled printmaker, Goya's set of 80 etchings called Los Caprichos is among some of his finest work. Inspired by his observation and critique of human foibles during the tumultuous era of late 18th century Spanish society, Los Caprichos is a series of dark satire filled with monsterous and foolish characters. If Goya were around today, I wonder what his take on celebrity gossip would be? All I know is that I saw this photo of Janice Dickinson crouching on the sidewalk and was overcome with cold fear tempered with gut-busting amusement. Medium: ink on paper. Much thanks to Miguel in Madrid for the translation.

Comments

[Sara]

Oh you've captured her perfectly! I work on Sunset and saw her frighting, skeletal shell walking into Coffee Bean a few weeks ago - she truly is SCARY (which makes the bats in your version so perfect)

As always you've made my day.

[Kai/Shalom]

Ahh! Really shouldn't have looked at the third picture. Well, if she weren't famous people would think she was just some batty (I'm sure what is referenced by the bats) homeless woman. Some reason reminds me of Wizard of Oz. I enjoy the sepia tone, makes it more dramatic.

What is that in her purse?

[Gigi]

Awsome interpretation....Goya would be proud

[FiFi]

this is absolutley fabulous! If she had any sense she would purchase it from you!

[LP]

Wow, nice work! I believe we had a first hand experience with Janice or someone who looks exactly like her (which could be possible in this town with drive-thru plastic surgery centers). About 2 years ago I was coming home & there was a car blocking our driveway with what seemed like a dead female slumped over the steering wheel. I parked on the street and walked up to the drivers side of the window, there was slow head movement & asked if I could help. The woman put her head up slowly and realized that I couldn't get up my driveway with her car blocking it. She said "oh sorry" in a slurred (she either was drunk,drugged or hungover) manner and then asked for directions to PCH (we live in a beach area of L.A.). I gave her directions and felt awful because she clearly shouldn't have been behind a wheel. She backed out hastely and barreled down the street. Within 5 minutes the police had arrived because our neighbor called out of concern, I told them where she was headed and don't know what happened from there on. I know what car she/or her look-a-like was in. It really looked & sounded a lot like Janice. My question is, does anyone out there know what kind of car Janice drives?

[jerkygirl]

I bet that's exactly what Janice sees when she looks out at the world, scary colors and Kirsten Dunst-ish bats and all. . .and I have to admit I'm a little afraid of what's crawling out of her bag. I'm not entirely sure what to make of it. :) I must say you've captured Essence of Janice perfectly with this one.

[Melanie]

I love how you got how old and wrinkled her hands are, and how totally untouched her face looks - it's a wonderful portrait.

[Marco]

Excelente trabajo; Jane ya puede sentirse inmortalizada. Felicidades.

[Erik]

She's such a freakish and mean looking woman, I have a hard time believing she doesn't stomp on kittens for relaxation.

[Knox Bronson]

oh you naughty naughty girl, 14 ...

[Christi]

Oh yes, she is one scary nightmarish figure! And how about her posing for all those pictures with her mouth wide open? Does she thaink that is attractive?

[Demon Kitty]

I developed a respect for Janice Dickinson after reading her autobiography, "No Lifeguard on Duty." Her father used to beat her with his fists regularly, because she wouldn't suck his cock. She saw him molesting her older sister which he did on a regular basis. Her father was a perverted monster. After her older sister got married, their father drove Janice to some isolated area. He started talking horribly about her sister, saying things like, "Do you think she lets him stick his cock up her tight little asshole?" amongst other disgusting things. Apparently, Janice didn't respond the way he wanted, so he beat her and put her into the trunk of his car. She lost consciousness. He found her and beat her again because she scared him into thinking she was dead. Fast forward several years- Janice is famous now and her mother and sister visit her. Her mother fails to mention that she has brought Janice's father along (Janice calls him the "rat bastard".). Janice notices he gets red faced and has chest pains and her mother gives him heart medication. He ends up beating Janice's mom and kicking Janice's dog. She calls the police and has to twist their arm a little to get them to intervene. They arrive. Her father gets afraid of them, then he loses it and starts fighting with them. An ambulance comes and they take him away. Janice follows the ambulance to the hospital in a car. She is angry as fuck. She looks over in the passenger's seat, sees his heart medication, and throws it out the window. They get to the hospital. The doctors ask, "what's wrong with him?" She says, "he's crazy!!!" The doctor asks, "what do you want me to do?
She says something like, "put him on ice, just finish him off, finish him off, take him out!!!" She loses it and they give her tranquilizers. At some point during all of this shit her father said something to her and she got up in his face and yelled, "Die motherfucker die!!!!! Why can't you just die, you motherfucker???!!!" As the health care workers are wheeling him away, they ask Janice, "Does he have any health problems?" "No!!!!" she says, "he is as healthy as a horse!!!"

"Die motherfucker, die!!" were the last words she said to him because the next morning, the hospital called and informed them that he died of a heart attack. Janice couldn't understand why her mother and sister were crying. "Shouldn't we be celebrating?" she asked them. This is one of the reasons I love Janice Dickinson. She is definitely off her rocker though. You know, when your hands start to get wrinkled, dagger length nails are not allowed. This is brilliant 14! Goya painted the world as it truly is! It makes me want to go read Arturo Perez-Reverte's "The Club Dumas".

[14]

The thing in her purse is a hobgoblin.

I don't know the purpose of her habit of posing for photos with her mouth gaping open, but I did attempt to make reference to it with the Janice Dickinson Bats in the background.

Muchos gracias,

mistress of the galactic owls

[lmj]

i know she's a wacked out crazy lady, but i kinda like her anyway. she looks like she'd be a fun person to hang with.

[fanny pack]

I interviewed Janice once and though she was a bit of a nut job, I really liked her. She's honest about who she is and where she came from -- which is more than I can say for a lot of Hollywood folks.

Fourteen, superb job on capturing her. She looks really beautiful and fucked up at the same time.

[tok2006]

great homage to Goya! he would be proud, i think!
kisses from Spain!
(i upload it to my blog, and send my visitors here!)

[Noelegy]

Brilliant, absolutely. I love Goya and I think this is a perfect artist/celebrity mashup.

[Barb]

I love this rendition of Janice, 14! Thanks for introducing me, and I'm sure others too, to Los Caprichos. I've always been a fan of Goya, but I didn't know about these works. They're amazing and the style is great. And your version of it is awesome!

[Steve]

Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha. So perfect!

[deanna1104]

huh.

[Judith Dolphin]

So many evil spirits in this picture. Must burn incense.

[gilmore]

You hit that crazy nail on it's crazy head. Well done as always. I love how this truly looks like an etching. You have some serious skills my friend.
xoxo

[Chansmom]

Nice! Now as for Janice....Get the net. LOL!

I know I've said it before, but when she was a super model, I was in awe of how gorgeous she was. I wanted to be her! Same coloring, I just had to grow taller. Hee hee. Well, fortunately, I grew up (mentally, but not in height), she still hasn't. What a waste.

[Viper Tetsu]

Muy caliente Goya homage!

You've somehow managed to clinch a great likeness, yet make Dickinson, um, appealing. If she looked this gothic deadsexy in real life, she'd actually have a reason for her customary public behavior (i.e, jumping around and yowling like a soused puma in an iron maiden).

Except for the arm. That scary and hilarious liverspotted arm. It's got me in titters right now.

[some happiness PLEASE]

hey 14,

i could really go for a beautiful portrait of flowers and butterflies nymphs fairies something fantastic and imaginative something to stare at to take one's mind off of the horror of this week past events. overworked and taxed emotionally by children who are afraid, questioning and wondering if mortality is really part of their cheery happy future. this week sucks for so many. maybe something nice to look at?