Nicole Richie: Hollywood Wildlife

Nicole Richie is reportedly seeking treatment to find out "why she can't gain weight". While we're happy she's finally taking care of her health, we wonder if she'll still make headlines once she returns to a less shocking size. If she's not a walking skeleton in a baggy size 0 bikini, will she still appear on the glossy covers of tabloids? If she's at a healthy weight, will the paparazzi still stalk her for the elusive money shot of Nicole consuming food? Will fervent speculation and scandal continue with sordid tales of drug use, eating disorders and collapsing in night clubs? Oh well, whether Nicole is skinny or not, she'll always look like a pygmy marmoset. That's not such a bad thing. Medium: Ink and acrylic on paper. This illustration appeared in the Animal magazine feature "Celebimals". Concept and Latin name by dlisted's Michael K.

Comments

[Johnny]

You definitely got her face right but the body's actually got some, well, body to it when we all know her skin's the only thing keeping her skeleton together. I see you got her skeletal hands perfectly though.

And I love her "latin" name. She could have also been Screamus Attentionus.

[Hugh G.]

Can't gain weight? Riiiiight. Millions of Americans would kill for that problem.

I think this nut job stays thin just so she can stay in the tabloids.

[ra]

hi guys i love you see? http://raymitheminx.blogspot.com/2006/11/nicole-richie-sure-is-fat.html

[Pablo Vazquez]

good as always..love Ur work!!

[Demon Kitty]

She looks better as a pygmy marmoset then she does as a human being. I am amazed at the gaul of these celebrities and their publicity flacks! How fucking stupid do they think we are? She doesn't have an eating disorder - she just has trouble gaining weight? Pu -leeeez. Living on a diet of cocaine and your own bile - she looks like my mother did during her last stages of liver cancer.

[KaTiE says gO!]

You evil evil evil sly little fox, Ms. 14. You chose a coca bush as the Nicole marmoset's perch. I like her blank expression as her tail harvests a branch of her future fix.

http://www.rain-tree.com/Plant-Images/erythroxylum-pic.htm

[jerkygirl]

Dear Nicole-
Pretending to eat for the paparazzi DOESN'T COUNT. Okay? Here's a tip to help you gain weight: To fully utilize the calories in a piece of pizza or a burrito, you have to actually SWALLOW the thing. Try it. It works!!!

P.S. Eerily and sadly accurate paws on that cute little marm. :)

[Heaven Nose]

We think the portrait flatters her too much.
The Schnoz and Goldilocks

[jack59]

hi guys,
sorry but you must know it,
Finally Bill Gates Bought Google!

see it there www.google59.com

[Noelegy]

Myself, I'm always amazed at the visigoth of celebrities. Never fails.

My only quibble is that pygmy marmosets are MUCH cuter than Nicole! But probably weigh about the same...

[Javelin]

ha ha love those skeletal claws/hands and the ribs poking out. poor nicole-- no matter how skinny she is, she'll always have that face.

[Viper Tetsu]

Somewhere in South America, there's an explorer who's left his laptop behind while fleeing from a tribe of especially pissed indigenous peoples.

A pack of pygmy marmosets have wandered upon this computer and popped it open. Poking randomly at the laptop's buttons, they activate the device and happen upon your site (bookmarked, I'm sure, by scientists and explorers the world over). Staring at the screen, they shriek primordially to the heavens, offended to the core of their collective primate being by this lovingly detailed illustration.

You've just managed to insult an entirely different species. Let's see Borat top THAT shit.

[Viper Tetsu]

Incidentally, I'm sure I'm not the only member of your cult foaming at the mouth over what the announced Britney/KFed split will spawn from your poison pens and paints...

[CMTG5555]

Seriously, that last picture on the linked page looks exactly like a long-lost Olsen triplet.

[phlegmfatale]

I think Nicole Richie and Starr Jones would make great twin bobble-head nodders, with their eerily bulbous eyes and heads too large for their bodies. Truly.

[Andrea]

She looks a bit like Candy Spelling there.
That flip! Yeah, the odds that a girl who was quite a bit heavier a few years ago now "can't gain weight" are even slimmer than she is. baw haw. sorry for the pun.
XO

[Bella]

Haha, she looks like my friend's mom as a pygmy marmoset, and she has an eating disorder too! Small world....

Great job 14, can't wait to see what the Spederline split will cause you to create!

hi, i am wondering why you choose to make her a monkey? she really does not look like one and some may think you are being a racist since she is a biracial (racist pigs like to call blacks monkeys). But since you are so open minded and apparently not a racist, I am sure your picturing her as a monkey was totally harmless!

[ali]

Ok now! If everything in your pictures symbolizes some aspect of the celebrity you are "making fun of," for instance in this picture; having the monkey perched on the coca bush and her tail "hooked" on/around the "fruit" of the coca bush does that mean you are a racist? You have her as a monkey and she is biracial, half white, half black, and racists like to call blacks, MONKEYS. I hope your choice of animal for Nicole was harmless but since you are so clever and witty, you really should have stayed away from the monkey image!

[Jenn F.]

Oh my God. Enough with the "that's racist cause Nicole's biracial" complaints.

You know, the black/monkey racist idea hadn't even crossed my mind until those two posts were put up by Ali and anonymous whoever. Thanks for taking a fantastic, funny piece of art and slapping racist suggestions all over it. Don't you think it's pretty racist to consider such a thing?

There's one thing you have to understand about racism: don't empower it. If you begin to avoid drawing a monkey because you think it'll be associated with a black person, you're just feeding the association between the two.

Besides, if you're even slightly familiar with the artist's work, you'd realize the suggestion is ludicrous. Don't try to read into it so hard. Just enjoy it.

[Kai]

Maybe she meant something, but I really doubt it. 14 did not make her look black at all. And she's just drawing her as an animal she resembles, and she does look a bit like a monkey. I didn't know she was biracial... Anyhow, I'm mixed race (Asian and European), people make stupid comments sometimes, I just brush it off. I don't think it's anything serious and I personally don't think Nicole Richie would get offended by this, she'd probably see it as either a) attention or b) something connected to her eating disorder, not her race. Maybe I spoke too much, but I think there is such a thing as being too PC. 14's a wonderful artist and would never stoop to something as low as making fun of race. Keep at it 14.

[Kai]

I feel slightly guilty for posting again, but, I want to agree with Jenn F., especially the whole "empowering racism" thing. I mean, if I want to save money and I like bagels, people could call me a sterotypical Jew, but by not doing those things, I'm giving in to the sterotypes. The way to avoid racism is for people to do what they do and ignore labels. Anyone can eat a bagel, and anyone can be drawn as a monkey, but it's only when you start attaching labels like "Jew" or "black" do these actions become significant.

Sorry for taking over your comments, it's just I couldn't resist... I love how a pop culture satire pic is turned into a whole racism debate. You need to go back to pictures where the only interpretation is a filthy one. Kidding. Don't worry about the critics. Carry on, 14, carry on.

[BDK]

She looks like one of those sponge monkeys from the old Quiznos commercials!

[Bea]

What a ridiculous suggestion that 14 is a racist for painting Nicole as a monkey! If I wanted to comment on Nicole being bi-racial, I'd paint her as a zebra wearing big sunglasses and a dew rag, with a sidekick in one hand and a crack pipe in the other.

But Nicole isn't bi-racial, she's adopted. So that wouldn't make sense.

[Haukky]

I don't know if it's a sorta of signature, but the 14 in roman's number is XIV and not XIIII.