Gallery of the Absurd

Britney, Kevin and Little Sean Preston

I played around in my time machine again this weekend and tore a photo from Star Magazine to bring back and show you.  Here we have a paparazzi photograph of Britney Spears and Kevin Federline taking their bouncing bundle of joy out for a stroll in the Hollywood Hills. Baby Sean Preston appears to be foaming at the mouth and has stained his face, hands and $800 designer warm up suit with sticky orange Cheeto goo. Mommy Britney looks a bit grossed out by the mess while Daddy Kevin looks on with detached amusement. Britney has just given Kevin a brand new $28,000 watch and he enjoys showing it off while guzzling his 64 oz Big Gulp.  I bet there's Orange Fanta inside that enormous cup....this family appears to enjoy consuming things that are bright orange.

Putting Paparazzi Photos to Good Use

The papparazzi lurk hidden in bushes outside of Los Angeles hot spots, waiting for the moment their celebrity prey begins to exhibit any behavior outside the norm of Hollywood power and glamour. These photos end up in tabloids under headlines such as, "Celebrity Flaws Exposed!!" and the magazines fly off the shelves.  If paparazzi photos sell tabloids, imagine how they could be used to sell movies, concerts, CDs and books! I hear the entertainment industry has been lagging in sales, so perhaps they might consider a new approach to marketing.  I saw this National Enquirer photo of Rod Stewart picking his nose in public while wearing a billowing white linen "puffy shirt" and my mind spun with possibilities. This is first in my series "Operation Paparazzi". More to come soon...

The Future of Tara Reid

I spent most of my weekend engaged in time travel. I always kick myself when I forget to bring my digital camera along, but this time I slipped it in my pocket.  Traveling through so many hyperdimensional wormholes can really wear a girl out, so I thought I'd stop and get some coffee. The only place open in Los Angeles in the year 2025 was a seedy bar on Sunset, so I walked in, sat at the bar and saw Tara Reid sitting at the other end.  I snapped her photo and figured I'd share it with you.